Love is hard; Saturn aspects

Lately I have been thinking about Saturn in synastry, it gets a really bad rap. I heard a relationship (composite) chart with Venus square Saturn will not make it. Venus the planet of love in hard aspect to planet of duty, restriction, and hardship is well uh hard. Love shouldn’t be hard, not in my opinion. Love should be transformative (Pluto) wild (Uranus) transcendental (Neptune) but hard no thank you. I did a reading for someone that often complains about marriage & raising children I knew he was going to have Saturn square Venus because even taking kids to little league games sounds like a chore. No matter who he would have married I would assume he would think, wow this is hard. Secretly I think he blames his wife, but really it’s him. That’s the natal aspect but in synastry if one persons Saturn opposes or squares another persons personal planet Sun (identity), Moon (feelings), Mercury (mind), Venus (love and finance) and Mars (sex) the Saturn person brings with them into the relationship the Saturian energy, for example they can often critique the Sun person for instance my Saturn in Leo squared the Sun of a Taurus I knew and I often made reference to the manner in which he lived his life. Negative references. Why are you this way? Why do you play things so safe? After awhile that can become annoying to the Sun person, for understandable reasons.
Signs are square one another when they are in the same mode Taurus and Leo are both fixed signs but the way they operate is very different.
I also know a person that has Saturn in Libra opposing my Moon in Aries (Aries and Libra are opposite in the zodiac) and while I have tremendous regard for them there is often a sense of not being able to plunge the depths of them emotionally. His Pluto is opposite my Moon which indicates emotional transformation but the degree is much wider than the square from Saturn, the tighter the orb the greater the impact.
While I would try to avoid Saturn in harsh aspect to Moon Sun Venus & definitely Mars (sexual issues like mad) in a Composite/Relationship chart. In Synastry I’m not so sure as of yet. I think it depends on the individual A. If they have a natal Saturn Square Venus and some ones Saturn Squares their Venus they are already accustomed to love being hard etc B. This took me a very long time to learn, but not everyone is looking for emotional exploration. So if I’m closed emotionally and some ones Saturn is in hard aspect to my moon. Maybe I would be ok with that because I like keeping people at emotional distances. The problem would arise when you have someone that is extremely emotional and needs to connect on a deeper level, but they feel the Saturn person is at a distance. You can’t quite reach them.
I would love to hear from anyone that has experienced hard Saturn aspects in synastry or composite. How did this manifest for you? Were you the Saturn person? Is love indeed hard

Follow up post with end result:

Let sleeping babies lie; Saturn in synastry



  1. Sometimes Saturn energy can feel very suppressing to the other person with the personal planet/angle. I have personal experience more than once when my Saturn had fallen on the Descendant. The affect was that it felt like I wasn’t allowing them to be fully themselves, but I actually did no actions to do this – it was just a perception from the other person (and with one example, my Saturn also opposed their Moon as well as their Ascendant, increasing this feeling). However, once it becomes conscious and communications are about how to positively express this energy (and maybe a couple behavior modifications that do not compromise but instead enhance meeting of needs for both parties), I could see this Saturn placement transforming into an influence that creates stability and long-term commitment. Of course it could also be that time needs to pass before this could be a real relationship, meaning it would be better if it were in maturity years than early on. I know that Saturn isn’t always bad, but for sure it needs acknowledgment! 🙂

  2. I love your take on this! It isn’t for everyone but some ties are necessary for grounding & living in reality. I met someone with Saturn in my moon but after dealing with a moon/Pluto person I don’t think I’m a fan of the emotional distance by Saturn & moon

  3. I’m currently with someone right now that brings a LOT of Saturn to our Synastry, and I have a lot of Pluto in my natal. In our synastry we have Venus square Saturn, Moon conj. Saturn, Mercury trine Saturn, and Sun trine Saturn. (Even Mars square Saturn, but the sex isn’t a problem…) As a person with heavy Pluto in my natal, the Saturn in this relationship can be very frustrating at times– but somehow we work. The emotional distancing can be really difficult, but I think it’s helped me to mature emotionally, which I have needed desperately. I find myself wanting more Pluto contacts, though… It’s a challenging love but I’ve grown in ways I never would’ve imagined.

  4. Oh thank you so much for sharing because I never really meet people with Saturn contacts , I m very Plutonian myself I think it would be challenging maybe less transformative but also less painful! Ps glad sex isn’t an issue;)

  5. I had a relationship with someone whose saturn opposed my venus … we lasted a good while though. He seemed content enough, but for myself, I couldn’t escape the nagging frustrated feeling that something was missing. I often felt disappointed that he couldn’t express himself emotionally/romantically as deeply as I wanted/needed (Scorpio is strong in my chart) … it felt almost as if he couldn’t allow himself to be too open or vulnerable with anyone (actually he had Saturn opposition Venus in his natal chart!) I also once experienced saturn sqr venus in a Composite … something very karmic about that one; it resulted in a lot of pain & anguish. In the end, it may have had it reasons for being, but “happily ever after” was clearly NOT one of them.

  6. Omg! Thanks for sharing. I recently liked someone we have the same composite square & his Saturn is in hard aspect to all my planets. I’m very scorpion like Pluto is heavy in my chart as well & he always felt far away & never expresses things. No go for me. And no more Saturn for me. Not on overkill atleast! Ha

  7. what would potential sexual issues with mars-saturn in relationships be? for example in conjunction? is the mars person just not attracted or saturn always turning them down?

  8. Thank you for replying! love your blog btw!
    I agree about taking the entire chart into account. I just say this because I’ve been very attracted to a man whose Mars is conjunct my Saturn and I found it so strange when I saw this aspect. However, there are other Mars and Saturn aspects going on between us, including Moon trine Saturn. I’m liking where it’s going so far 🙂

  9. Hi!

    I thought I d write something as someone who s a very strong Saturn influence.

    I am Gemini with moon, Saturn, Uranus and Neptune in Capricorn.

    Venus in cancer opposite Saturn/Neptune

    Venus in the 10th ( so libra ascendant )


    Mars / ruler of the 7th house … In the 10th ( although in leo).

    So as you can see I am cappy/10th house/ Saturn heavy.

    Young it’s been hard. Felt unattractive and unlovable but then since I reached 27 that feeling is gone. Why? Well I understood what love really was by taking care of myself first e.g imagine your dream boyfriend. What would he need to do to make you happy/ how you he need to make you feel? Then find ways to make yourself feel that way by yourself. Do it repetitively ( Saturn means continuous, repetitive work to master). Do it as often as possible, as regularly as possible.
    Need examples?
    Step 1
    – Go running 3 times a week or more ( it releases happy hormones
    – find a hobby
    – be passionate about something
    – have massages
    – travel
    -write affirmations
    -write words of gratitudes

    Step 2
    Rejection is a bit thing for venue Saturn people – but they need to reframe it.
    Ok imagine your crush does not like you back. Well you may as well know sooner than later so you can redirect your affection towards someone else- screen out people so that you get closer to your best match.

    Have an abundant mindset if it’s not mister A then remember the alphabet have 26 letters!!!!

    Not everyone is compatible and it s not a big deal.

    Step 3: learn about human psychology, learn about relationships and how to relate, learn about what men and women want in relationships.
    Polish your social skills –

    Step 4: create the right boundaries.
    By that I mean you need to know your deal breakers with man/woman and stick to them.

    Step 5: meet people, interact with as many people as possible and ask yourself NOT if they like you BUT if you like them.
    Saturn means restrictions so really only a few people will really be compatible with you so it means you have to meet as many as possible to increase the number of possibilities.

    If you stay at home and close yourself; you ll just be making it difficult for you to find good match.

    Venus Saturn means you need to put some effort in love – unfair? Yes but necessary really. But think of the positives: you are improving yourself.

    Final tip? Give the love you want to receive!!

    If you want more opportunities in love you have to give more opportunities to others.

    Good luck guys!! And trust me it will be worth it; have faith 🙂

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