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Synastry You dont attract what you want, you attract what you are…


In my late twenties I use to lie to myself and say “I want a calm normal relationship, why can’t I have a tranquil relationship. I use to lie to myself but I won’t dare lie to you today. I want a passionate partnership, I want my intensity dial turned up to 100, and I don’t have a clue what I would do with a “normal and tranquil” relationship. I guess that’s a good thing because they always elude me. In my natal chart I have an Aries moon, the moon is your comfort level Aries is the sign of the warrior.

Aries Sun Lady Gaga Sings in the song “Marry the Night” I’m gonna marry the night. I won’t give up on my life. I’m a warrior queen Live passionately tonight.

Just as the Cancer Moon finds safety at home, and Pisces moon may find religion or alcohol a comfort zone and a Libra moon needs to always be in a partnership, Scorpio moons destroy themselves, Virgo moons need to take care of others well Aries moons need battle, conflict, we find comfort in doing battle. We need the rush, the highs…there is simply no changing or denying that. My moon opposes my Pluto in the 8th house and Squares my Sun in the 5th.  Complicated order! Pluto on the Sun and Moon is not for the faint of heart. Relationships involve dominance, control, possession, issues surrounding jealousy and shared resources.

I laugh thinking I wanted a light love, a tranquil love. I didn’t know who I was in my late 20’s.  It is only over the last several years I have come to terms with who I am….or at the very least attempting too come to terms with who I am. Warrior Queen sounds about right

I saw an ex of mine, the last time I saw him was 7 years ago. I actually see him in 7 year intervals for most of our lives. He is important to me; he is someone that holds significance. He said to me something I always say to other people; real love doesn’t really die. If it is genuine it lives on. Ahhh god nothing like those loves in your youth.

While looking at his chart I could see the glaring similarities between us, but it made me wonder if we should seek out partnerships with those that are similar to us or those that can balance us?

I have been wondering about the relationships we form with people that inadvertently bring out our worst traits; whether that be our insecurities, over indulgence, or possessiveness.  Or what about those whos worst traits mirror our own more difficult attributes.

In synastry it is often said you find comfort in dating someone with the same moon sign. And I have always said I can’t date another Aries moon because we will kill one another. I mean who will take a step back, who will be the reasonable one?

I looked at my Leo ex’s chart and he has an exact moon square mars; this is very similar to having an Aries moon. Hot headed, emotionally impulsive, with a short fuse. He himself like moi, is attracted to relationships that involve conflict and battle.

It was many years ago that we were together and things fell apart do to his imposing his will on me. He would actually tell me “my will is stronger than yours”

In Synastry my Mars squares his Sun; this is where aggression (mars) and will power (mars) meets his ego and identity (my sun). The other day he remarked I try to overpower him. I assure you I don’t; this is simply how he receives me.

However Sun square Mars is a very combative aspect in synastry, one that I think may even negate a lot of beautiful synastry, we have major 7th house overlays my Venus and Mars fall in his 7th and his Sun, Venus, Mercury and Mars fall in my 7th. Obviously this is indicative of an important relationship; but never forget the 7th house rules partnership and open enemies.  Love gone wrong often becomes hate.

I have natal Mars in the 3rd; the 3rd house rules communication. Mars is the planet of aggression. I am blunt and direct in speech, people always say I am the most direct and honest person. If you don’t like me you will probably say I am rude.

My Leo ex has Mars conjunct Mercury; this is the same sort of dynamic simply in another form. Our Mercury’s correspond to one another nicely and I actually find him very funny; he is more direct then me which I find immensely refreshing. But would I want to argue with him, probably not we are both very assertive and go for the jugular. Who would take a step back and be the voice of reason?

So many things have crossed my mind lately; mostly the quote “you don’t attract what you want; you attract what you are”.

For so long I wondered why normal and serene relationships alluded me, and now I have the answer  perhaps because I am not a tranquil and serene person myself.

Mostly I think we can use astrology when relating to others; we can pinpoint the areas in relationships that will be a source of contention and bring them to light. Maybe and I do mean MAYBE in warrior relationships you can take turn yielding to one another. What do you think visit me on twitter and let me know? Should we avoid relationships with those that are similar? Do we need to find our opposites to find a balance?


12 thoughts on “Synastry You dont attract what you want, you attract what you are…

  1. Ah, I would say yes, but then I have the Libra moon, the very opposite.
    I say we attract what we need, whether we think that we want it or not !

    And to paraphrase Elizabeth Spring, with the north node in Libra, the battle is over, the war is won, and we learn to live in peace.
    And just in case, we have the south node warrior to help us in times of need.
    God bless.

  2. “Pisces moon may find religion or alcohol a comfort zone”

    I have to argue with you slightly on this one. Religion is ruled by Sagittarius/Jupiter (aka, faith with lots of rules and doctrine). Spirituality is Neptune/Pisces (the return to the ocean of everything).

    Agree with the second part, drugs/alcohol are definitely a Pisces issue. (My alcoholic mother is a textbook definition for me having a Pisces Moon.)

    – Pisces Moon

  3. I love that! “We attract what we need whether we think we want it or not”

  4. You are more then welcome to argue with me lol yes you are correct 9th house and sag rule religion

  5. Yep. And meeting every 7 years is intriguing. Like a natural cycle of marriage and divorce, following the 29.5 year orbit of Saturn. Starting with the conjunction, the first square, the opposition, the second square, and the return. All very Robert Hand transits, but I’m sure you know this!

  6. Love your blog! I have a Virgo moon however lol and

  7. I love Virgo Moons you are great caretakers

  8. 🙂 Thank you! My mom is a Virgo and I felt I acted like her for a reason. I love Astrology! I’m a Libra sun. I’m a attracted to an Aries with a Gemini moon and date one with a Libra moon LOL

  9. its crazy when the moon sign or sun sign reflects the parents sign!

  10. YES!!!!! My dad and I have similar traits personality wise and so do my mother and me. It’s funny, but I love that mixture. My rising is Sagittarius so, yeah that’s something else within itself. Fire sign people come up to me thinking I’m one way and then when they get to know me, it’s completely different LOL

  11. To me, the descendant´s sign (7th house) shows the sun sign person we should date, if you have Leo in the 7th house probably you should date someone with a fire sun sign.

    The moon´s sign shows what moon sign we should look for in another person, but it does not necessarily have to be the same sign, for example if you have Moon in Aries, probably you will appreciate someone who has Moon or Venus in a fire sign.

    The house that Venus sits, shows what area of life we will mostly show love and affection, and the Venus´s sign shows the way we demonstrate that affection.
    If you have Venus in Cancer, probably you will appreciate someone who has Venus or Moon in a water sign.

    The asteroid Juno eventually shows the kind of person we are getting married to.
    The house where Juno sits, shows where will you meet that person, and Juno´s sign reflects what kind of personality she has.

  12. 7th house scorpio + Uranus charging it up. Not to mention a Pluto square venus.

    I was on my knees with fierce, manipulative women and intense relationships till i realised…….. it was just me..

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