I have been thinking about Saturn lately. I know I have written about him before you can take a look here:

http://starsmoonandsun.com/tag/saturn-conjunct-venus/

Love is hard; Saturn

http://starsmoonandsun.com/tag/saturn-transits/

Saturn in Synastry Round 2

Let Sleeping babies lie; Saturn in the Saturn

If you are familiar with me you will know I have Saturn in the 7^th house, Saturn in the 7^th is similar to Venus in Capricorn, Capricorn or Aquarius on the 7^th house cusp or Saturn aspecting Venus Hastag #SameShitDifferentAspect

Restriction in love

Blocks to love

Delays in love

I admittedly only recently came to realize I keep people at arms length, Saturn is cautious-Once bonds are formed with a Saturn person they know they are etched in stone, Sade’s “Like a Tattoo” song comes to mind. Personally I also have a heavy Pluto on my Sun, Moon, Jupiter, Saturn, Midheaven and Ascendant. I am prone towards extremes in dealing with people. I either love them or hate them, rarely lingering in indifference this only enhances difficulties in relationships.

Back to Saturn

A few weeks ago someone expressed to me they don’t feel I love them; they are undergoing Saturn hard transits (conjunction, oppositions and/or square) to their Sun, Moon and Venus simultaneously.  I attempted to reassure them that I do love them to no avail. They said they don’t feel I love them because of this that and the other. I thought to myself: this is so Saturn, wanting people to prove your love to them, setting a standard or a bar for how people should love you.  I thought of the quote

“Just because someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to doesn’t mean they don’t love you with all they have”

Saturn/Venus can put loved ones through a series of tests wanting the other party to prove their love and devotion.  Likely the person jumping through hoops is set up for failure because Saturn sets the bar too high, Saturn can have unrealistic expectations. I contemplated how to proceed but I’m not a fan of proving myself to anyone, take me as I am or pretty much watch me as I go is my motto.

I know this person is going through quite an ordeal they aren’t into astrology and they aren’t in a state of awareness so I left the door open for them to come back… likely when this transit is over.

Saturn/Venus transits or natal can indicate issues of self worth, setting high unachievable standards for others, relationships feel like they are a lot of work, sometimes a person feels so unlovable themselves they project that out into the world feeling as though no one will love them (love is first and foremost an inside job). You can’t keep people at bay while simultaneously desiring them to love you. Life doesn’t work that way.

I confess I myself in the past have had walls (Saturn) so high with a list of requirements it would be unlikely anyone could reach.

According to Liz Green in Saturn An New Look at  A Old Devil “Venus Saturn combinations imply a certain amount of emotional pain in the early home life” it suggests lack of affection or direct appreciation for who the child is as an individual according to Greene. She further goes on to write about Venus Saturn contacts “These are people whose emotional growth has been stunted in childhood”.

Sometimes you find a Venus/Saturn person so devastated by a first love or heartbreak they cut themselves off vowing to never let anyone hurt them again.

I have known a man for several years he has Moon in Capricorn and Venus conjunct Saturn. He hasn’t been in a relationship ever nearing the age of 50 and while he is always gracious and fun (Gemini Sun), and bluntly honest (Mars on the Ascendant in Aquarius) I don’t think he will ever let anyone in. Unlike the other person I mentioned, he isnt open to love PERIOD, he isnt looking for you to prove anything to him. He seems to spend his life with people that do not know him, a superficial sort of travel and party lifestyle with various companions/friends/lovers. I saw him recently for my birthday after having not seeing him in about a year and a half. We have great synastry so its always all love, light and a natural ease when we get together. But I know he will never let anyone in. Maybe that’s a part of my own Saturn in the 7^th house, attracting people that keep me out. I always have a strong desire toward prying someone open. This would never happen here, he is tightly sealed. He mentioned to me how its always easy being together, that no one in his entire life ever treated him like I do. I once bought him flowers. He is the only man I ever bought flowers for. My Mars in Taurus conjuncts his Venus I’m sure that had something to do with it. Sometimes if I see something, a quote, a cartoon, or a piece of art that reminds me of him I will send it to him. He said no one ever sends him things or touches him so light not like I do. I don’t attempt to change/mold/prove to him anything only making a mental note that the reason he surrounds himself with people that don’t care about getting close to him is so he will never have to get hurt. He prefers it that way. Recently telling me “if people see your weak spot they will only use it to hurt you”. Saturn on Venus can’t deal with the thought of rejection. If you never get close to anyone or let anyone in, no one can possibly hurt you.

This is a man with both of his feminine Planets influenced by Saturn, Moon in Capricorn (rules mom and women in his life) is ruled by Saturn and Venus the female principal is squared by Saturn. He will not acknowledge anything family wise except to say everyone loves his parents and his father is a high level attorney. Moon/Saturn or Moon in Capricorn restricts emotional outpouring. Here is another issue of feeling worthy or needing people to prove their worth to you. According to the book The Astrology of Family Dynamics Moon in Capricorn “it is not the lack of love but the ability to demonstrate or express loving feelings is diminished”. I simply wish him love, light and healing thoughts always knowing his capacity to receive love is at a limited capacity.

Right now I am going through a Saturn opposite my natal Venus transit, oppositional transits often involve people on the outside, coming to you or you can experience the opposition as a projection…those people don’t love me, those people have hurt me. Placing blame on to others what you don’t recognize in yourself that is what is happening with the person i mentioned early on.

Ultimately Saturn lessons involve; learning how to let people in, learning how to trust, learning to forgive people for not being 100% of what you want them to be; no one can meet that requirement. And if you have Saturn/Venus people in your life simply tell them I love you I am here if you need me and wish them love and light.