Love is hard; Saturn

Lately I have been thinking about Saturn in synastry, it gets a really bad rap. I heard a relationship (composite) chart with Venus square Saturn will not make it. Venus the planet of love in hard aspect to planet of duty, restriction, and hardship is well uh hard. Love shouldn’t be hard, not in my opinion. Love should be transformative (Pluto) wild (Uranus) transcendental (Neptune) but hard no thank you. I did a reading for someone that often complains about marriage & raising children I knew he was going to have Saturn square Venus because even taking kids to little league games sounds like a chore. No matter who he would have married I would assume he would think, wow this is hard. Secretly I think he blames his wife, but really it’s him. That’s the natal aspect but in synastry if one persons Saturn opposes or squares another persons personal planet Sun (identity), Moon (feelings), Mercury (mind), Venus (love and finance) and Mars (sex) the Saturn person brings with them into the relationship the Saturian energy, for example they can often critique the Sun person for instance my Saturn in Leo squared the Sun of a Taurus I knew and I often made reference to the manner in which he lived his life. Negative references. Why are you this way? Why do you play things so safe? After awhile that can become annoying to the Sun person, for understandable reasons.
Signs are square one another when they are in the same mode Taurus and Leo are both fixed signs but the way they operate is very different.
I also know a person that has Saturn in Libra opposing my Moon in Aries (Aries and Libra are opposite in the zodiac) and while I have tremendous regard for them there is often a sense of not being able to plunge the depths of them emotionally. His Pluto is opposite my Moon which indicates emotional transformation but the degree is much wider than the square from Saturn, the tighter the orb the greater the impact.
While I would try to avoid Saturn in harsh aspect to Moon Sun Venus & definitely Mars (sexual issues like mad) in a Composite/Relationship chart. In Synastry I’m not so sure as of yet. I think it depends on the individual A. If they have a natal Saturn Square Venus and some ones Saturn Squares their Venus they are already accustomed to love being hard etc B. This took me a very long time to learn, but not everyone is looking for emotional exploration. So if I’m closed emotionally and some ones Saturn is in hard aspect to my moon. Maybe I would be ok with that because I like keeping people at emotional distances. The problem would arise when you have someone that is extremely emotional and needs to connect on a deeper level, but they feel the Saturn person is at a distance. You can’t quite reach them.
I would love to hear from anyone that has experienced hard Saturn aspects in synastry or composite. How did this manifest for you? Were you the Saturn person? Is love indeed hard

Follow up post with end result:

Let sleeping babies lie; Saturn in synastry


  1. I’m currently seeing a man who has natal Saturn square my Moon Venus conjunction in Cancer. He has a natal Moon in Capricorn square Saturn in Libra in the 7th house. I’m very affectionate. He discourages that verbally. He’s told me repeatedly he’s afraid of relationships, and with Saturn in Libra in the 7th I know he is. It’s very difficult to feel him or connect with him in a deep, emotional way, which is what I want. He just doesn’t want to go there. His Moon/Saturn square (along with a Moon/Uranus opposition) suggests he has what Jungians call an “inferior feeling function,” which means he doesn’t understand feeling or relate well on that level. He judges me for feeling, or things I do because of what I feel, and he minimizes my depth of feeling. An irony here is that he assumes I have negative feelings when I don’t. I take everything he says too much to heart. He brings up my fear of loss.

    Even though I’m aware of projection and that the negative emotions he thinks I have are really his, he’s not aware of it and I feel misunderstood.

    He had a brutal childhood, two alcoholic parents. I have a soft spot for him. I want to make up for all that and give him what he never had. I also feel protective of him and do my best not to hurt his feelings. He’s surprisingly traditional when it comes to the role of men and women in relationship. I have a Moon/Uranus conjunction and I’m not.

    I feel a deep attachment and love, and I’m very ambivalent. He’s cactus to my rose petals. But, I also know that there’s something imperishable to be gained in loving someone who isn’t easy to love which is why I stay, at least for now.

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